Salman Aslam

Candid Schmooze

Social Etiquettes and Fauxpas

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An overview of  last two decades saw a major resurgence in technological advancement. Massive advancement in form of laptops, computers and tech savvy mobiles has resultantly caused an alarming moral retrogression. Apart from its plethora of advantages it exudes moral retrograde and decay. Resultantly societal values, manners and courtesies have been dealt a stunning blow.During course of my discussion I shall be dwelling on certain major gaffes, acts of impropriety and in decorum. With passage of time how the written word which reflected personal touch has been replaced by texts’ and E-mails.There is a very apt saying that when you are young you want to change the world. As you get older you want to change youth. Good manners reflect consideration for others, politeness and decency. Some of the major social blunders and breaches of decorum and decency are appended below:-

  • Decline in use of words like thanks, excuse me, beg your pardon and please, if you don’t mind have been relegated to a much lower threshold.
  • Tendering apologies/regrets is dwindling. Acceptance of ones follies has created a society which is stoical, callous and indifferent.
  • Sans manners/etiquette a society becomes intolerant showing extreme responses whereas a volatile situation could have been averted. Road rage is a case in point.
  • Instilling and infusing good manners is a reflection of good breeding. Unfortunately moral values have become virtually extinct which is spine-chilling.
  • Basic manners have eroded and plummeted to levels hence seen as appalling. These include not offering compliments, no respect for elderly/ladies by not opening doors or offering seats.
  • Breaking queues by all forms of shortcut is really irksome. Jostling and pushing by transgressing on space of others.
  • Punctuality and non-adherence to time in all spheres be it official or private has reached alarming proportions. Being late is a fashion gimmick to gain attention rather than being ashamed.
  • RSVP is not comprehended at all. No one bothers to confirm or regret attendance to host.
  • Use of personal handwritten letters, thank you notes, condolences and felicitations messages has become almost become extinct. Thereby losing personal touch.
  • Messages Eid greetings sent by mail, SMS other social media reflect a mechanical touch bereft of feelings and candor.
  • Enslavement of public on mobile phones has had an extremely pernicious impact in erosion of good manners. Addiction to texting, selfie craze and surfing of the net especially of promiscuous porno channels is shattering moral fiber of youth.
  • Use of mobiles in mosques, libraries and other restricted places is indeed indecorous.
  • Texting and use of mobiles while driving is indeed a criminal offence where safety of all is at stake. Speaking shop in a boisterous tone on mobile is indeed irritating.
  • Spitting and littering in public is a ghastly sight.
  • Burping and flatulence in public is indeed nauseating.
  • Biting of nails, nose blowing or flossing is also repulsive.
  • Shaking hands with gloves and talking without removing sun glasses is considered impolite. Not getting up to exchange pleasantries and handshake.
  • Shaking hands while looking elsewhere by offering fingers only in a weak grip. The bone crusher grip is also a social gaffe.
  • Dressing in an outrageous manner in contravention to specified dress code can be repugnant and embarrassing.
  • Avoidance of controversial subjects like politics, religion and women is considered a good norm as this could cause rancor and animosity.
  • Showing extreme bad manners by not returning calls, books. Returning borrowed books with name of murderer written on top of a mystery novel.
  • Extremely bad table manners by chewing with open mouth, clanking of cutlery and elbows on table are considered indecorous.
  • Not opening doors as a matter of courtesy and banging at face of oncoming persons. Not offering seats to ladies/elderly. Bespeaks of grave misdemeanor.
  • Parking in place of lot reserved for disabled is certainly a peccadillo.
  • Before switching channels of TV/cable permission of the senior most is sought.
Courtesy, manners and consideration for others is the essence of good etiquette. Moral decadence, declining values and ethos has resulted in degradation of society as a whole. We have to stem the rot. Our societal fabric is in grave threat of total disarray unless corrective /remedial measures are taken.

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posted by Salman Aslam @ 9:14 PM,

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